Posts Tagged ‘humor

28
May
08

At war with oneself–animation

Just click on the link below, click on play, then leave the mouse alone.

I was sent this and just had to put it up for you to see. Not kidding.

[FLASH]

Animator vs. Animation

24
Mar
08

HERE’S LOOKING AT YOU!

It’s dark out. You are on I-10 leaving Tucson Arizona but cannot see clearly to San Antonio Texas. What can you do if you are cruising at 1,000 miles an hour? Well we have the answer!!!!!!

New

Macular degeneration HEADLIGHTS FOR YOUR CAR!

Now you can see forever. Who cares if it blinds the oncoming traffic. At least you will be safe! And that’s what counts!

This is to all you who do not notice how those bright bluish head-beams of yours are even more irritating that driving at oncoming traffic with the brights on.

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21
Mar
08

YOU KNOW WHAT?

ENIGMATICA

(They way the tee shirt was before thinking of this post.)

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THE PIED PIPER ALLEGORY

Of course I wear my underwear inside out, doesn’t everyone?

You have got to be kidding!

You mean they let those tags scratch their skin?

No! You cut them off!

And what about those ridges on the seems? You just going to let those wear away until you get cancer from the long term irritation?

OK. Just forget about the irritation points.

Your underwear is under!

Hello!

Afraid someone going to see you as being different? Oh my goodness, someones different, run quick!?

Who you impressing; the inside of your outer shirt or your pants? You conformist make me giggle. I’m glad there are just so many of you to keep the comedy show afloat.

It’s called do as you are led by appearances. Follow the conformist flow. Don’t be unique even if it makes sense to you. YOU MUST CONFORM! CONFORM. CONFORM. CONFORM. ACT NORMAL, CONFORM…

…and so they went, down to the sea cliff, and over the edge. Never to think for themselves again. But they made excellent shoppers. Knowing which way was up, all the way to the sea.

{why it is called uhsure}

19
Mar
08

BACTERIA PRINT

They say your eyes have reached their old prime at 11 or 12 years old, then it is all down hill.

Well I remember being a little worried then. What do they mean? Will it all start getting blurry? I already had to squint to try to read things.

Once I was an adult and could afford contact lenses, a new world opened up. Eyes over the hill indeed! Now reality was clear and frankly, kinda harsh in its sharpness.

I waited to wonder what nuance this peaked at 12 meant?

WHY SO TINY?

Then I began to notice, particularly after 55 but a little before, that print on packages was too small to make out. It really seemed smaller. We began to call it bacteria print since it looked like bacteria in a petri dish who seem to not know the alphabet or how to spell well at all.

One explanation I heard a decade or so ago was the hot shot designers were mostly 30 somethings or less and had no idea they were soon to be the vision impaired. I suppose we can attribute homo-my generation is all a sapient for the error of inclusion. It might have even been more sinister than that.

First the smallest print was the ingredient list, which might have information that would seem troubling to one if it was legible. It could have been to save a bit of ink. Now days even the plastic types triangle info for recycling is getting worn away, sometimes a number is somewhere near it. Is that the right kind for our recycling? We only take two of the seven or more types, some places take them all!

Now there are even plastic containers that no matter where you look; no triangle, no 5 0r is that an upside-down 2? No nothing but into the trash.

I am not sure aging and eye degeneration are the only reason for the small print seeming unintelligible, but at times it is true that throw sunlight on the small print and I can read it well, especially without contacts in that restrict eye focusing some. Eyes do seem to need more light but also find it at times too bright and irritating. I cannot say colors have changed at all, seeming as vivid as ever, and with contacts or glasses I still get 15-20 vision. Meaning in case you forgot having 20-20 vision and all; that I can see at 20 feet what normal can only make out at 15. But the ability of the eye to focus does seem to decline.

So you under thirty year olds. Is the small print really tiny or are the oldsters making it up?

Even with a wide screen TV. Some of the small print disclaimer or whatever it is, is both too small to decipher and on too short to care to try.

COMING TO A PETRI DISH NEAR YOU, THE MOVIE OF A LIFETIME: AGING!

Get the popcorn!

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18
Mar
08

STUCK IN THE MIDDLE WITH?

WATCH THE NARRATIVES SPROUTING THAT SEEM TO TAKE HOLD IN THE SOGGY MIDDLE OF THE FIELD OF THE POPULATION.

We have the population poised for mindblank.  Fill in the synaptic connections.

We will forget who got us into the mess we are in as a nation. Fear will turn this mushy swishy middle voter, into fallen over once upon a fear fence leaner’s.

Unfair. May I repeat, unfair and out of context story-lines will be created. Good people will seem sinister, the swishy swashy middle fence sitters will tumble to the side spewing the most vile and veiled innuendo. Its weight pulling them as if by cause of reason.

It happens every time!

Works like a charm!

“Did you hear who so and so really is? Shocking!”

They suggested we were tired of the mud, the out of context and ground up truth made into voodoo dolls, but the needles stick every time!

Sure the confident “polar opposites” may be unswayed by the manure spreader, rightly or wrongly. It is that mind-crunched middle, musing over who knows what; a certain word or concept focus groups have found to be a sword, a hammer, a bullet, who knows. They will make up that confused and ambivalent mind of theirs, or sit out until someone tells them what to think, a friend or family member? Then they will feel the power. Their vote will become pointed, like a weather vane into the breeze of localized mind zeitgeist.

With a heart of wind and metal, they will become; the decider. They may receive a little sticker after that, saying, “I VOTED“, as if that actually meant something to be proud of in their instance.

Then they will return to their field with outstretched arms and funny hat; hay sticking out from their cuffs, hoping against hope, to keep the thoughts from landing in the field and consuming all of their confusion. In this mission they will, until next harvest season, or a fall burn-off, be quite successful.

18
Mar
08

Hello world! HOW DID YOU FIT INSIDE MY COMPUTER?

Welcome to the most surest blog site there ever was this side of uncertainty!

Read at your own risk.




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